Self help Nottingham group development

Group Development

Self Help Nottingham offers support, advice and resources to self help support groups in the Greater Nottingham area. Groups need only pick up the phone and ask to speak to a Groups Training and Development Worker. Support can range from straight forward advice and information on funding or developing constitutions to more long-term support around problem-solving, group dynamics and conflict resolution. The Groups Training and Development Workers can also help individuals who wish to start a new group.

Starting a new group

Many people approach Self Help Nottingham with a view to starting a new self help support group. Sometimes their plans are well-advanced but more often they simply want to talk to someone before deciding whether or not to move ahead with their ideas. Most people benefit from exploring the implications of setting up a new group, particularly in relation to the amount of time and energy they can spare and how this might impact on their health and well-being. In our experience it takes about a year to get a group to the point where it is meeting regularly with a small membership. In some cases, particularly if the group is for people facing an uncommon situation or rare condition, it can take a little longer. Sadly some groups never get off the ground despite the enthusiasm and commitment of everyone involved.

Self Help Nottingham can help new and fledgling groups with:

A place to explore ideas and plans
Advice and guidance on good practice
Help with drafting and producing publicity materials
Help with getting in touch with potential members
Information on venues and meeting rooms
Ongoing support and training

Support for established groups

Once a group has set out along the path to becoming established the support provided by Self Help Nottingham also continues.

Most groups have a need for a little support from time to time. Finances, falling membership, the introduction of new projects, imbalance in work loads, problem solving and lack of interest are all common areas of concern for established self help groups. Sometimes all that is required is a sounding board or listening ear at other times accurate information and sound advice helps to move the group on. The Self Help Development Workers at Self Help Nottingham are available to assist groups with many issues, including:

Problem solving

help to clearly define the issue
generate ideas
explore options and solutions
support through their introduction
help to review and evaluate progress

Policy Development

child protection
vulnerable adults
financial procedures
risk assessment
equal opportunities

Diversity

review barriers to participation
work to assist the group to become more inclusive
review literature etc. to attract a more diverse membership
provide diversity training

Funding

provide information on sound financial management
suggest sources of funding
assist with gathering evidence
dvise on the application process
assist with costings
review applications

Committee skills

review policies
help to work together more effectively
review roles and responsibilities
problem solve
review and up-date aims and objectives
mediate in disputes

Self Help Nottingham also provides:

a calendar of free training courses for groups
key member days
networking opportunities
development days and discussion forums
resource loan
briefing papers
a link between professionals and groups

If you feel your group might benefit from some extra help or support, or if you would like further information about setting up a self-help support group in the Greater Nottingham area, contact Self Help Nottingham's Groups Training and Development Team by clicking here to send an email.

Search for connections but don’t deny difference — it makes us what we are!

I thought I was the only one in the world to go through this — then I met people who had shared a similar experience. They responded, acted and felt just like me. The relief I felt was tremendous.

The need to know that you are not alone with your pain (often called universality) is frequently quoted as the reason people seek out self help support groups. This search for similarity may include both demographic characteristics, age, sexuality, culture, religion etc. and other commonalities of experience, for example shared emotions, feelings, outlook and ideology.

Research shows that people who go to groups hope to meet ’people like them’ and, furthermore, that a sense of belonging and bonding to the group is more likely if newcomers perceive members to be similar to themselves.

So what does ‘similar to themselves’ really mean?

People who look like them
People who sound like them
People with the same background
People who hold the same beliefs
People who talk like them

Seeking out similarities is quite natural on the surface. Young people with a cancer diagnosis will have different needs and experiences from older people with cancer and may reject a cancer support group where the average age is 55, in favour of their own group. However, whilst they may seek to be exclusive in terms of age, their group may be very inclusive — an arena where young people of different cultural and racial backgrounds, gay and lesbian, married and single form a strong bond cemented by cancer and youth and the shared experience that this brings.

Conversely a younger person may think they are looking for age similarity and find instead commonality of emotions.

I felt so much anger when my husband died — I was just 27 with a new baby and a 2 year old. I was furious with my husband for ruining the future we’d planned and for leaving me so young with 2 little girls to bring up alone. I didn’t know how I was going to manage and I felt so guilty about my anger. A friend suggested a self help group and images of older people sprang to mind and I thought how am I going to relate to them? But when I went along to the group I heard people recall their anger, without apology or guilt. I tentatively raised the issue of my own feelings and was relieved by their response. One man, at least 20 years my senior, said -

“Friends and family were able to cope with my grief and sorrow but any mention of anger and they ran a mile. Feel free to let rip, anger is a normal part of grief, its something a lot of us have experienced”.

At that moment nothing mattered but that shared emotion.

Communicating well in a group takes skill, empathy and sensitivity. The skilled self helper looks for connectors, those areas of shared experience — often the expression of emotions, fears and feelings that are shared across cultures, class and creed. Where differences do exist, for example in how people are treated, the experience of racism, cultural values and norms, religious beliefs etc. — these differences can be listened to and acknowledged. By acknowledging difference the group is recognising and affirming another member’s lived experience that differs from their own.

Where there is difference, particular care needs to be taken not to make judgments about an individual’s reactions and responses to events and circumstances. A good example is the hair loss which results from cancer treatments — the personal impact may be felt quite differently by different people:

A young woman whose hair is her 'crowning glory'
A Rastafarian whose locks have taken 20 years to grow, providing an outward sign of a religious, cultural and spiritual journey taken in the process of 'locking' their hair (growing dreadlocks)
A white, middle-aged man who is clean shaven and balding
A practising Sikh who keeps his hair uncut in accordance with Kesh which is one of the five Ks showing obedience to God and the teachings of the Guru

There are of course groups who do serve a single community, for example Muslim women who have experienced domestic violence. These groups may have narrowed down their ‘area of interest’ for a number of reasons, including:

Shared language making communication easier
Shared religious and cultural values that shape the way they feel and experience their lives
A shared starting point
A solidarity in their minority status (both in their own community and the wider community)
A shared experience of racism, sexism or oppression

Some Muslim women who have experienced domestic violence may find the shared experience of a group defined by cultural and religious boundaries helpful. Other Muslim women may actively seek out domestic violence support groups for predominantly white women because they feel that this will suit their needs best.

Managing diversity is a challenge in any group whether it is predominantly black, white or mixed. People will differ in terms of educational achievements, lifestyle choices, life experiences, politics, age, gender and in numerous other ways. By treating everyone as an individual, by listening to and acknowledging areas of difference, members can find a wealth of shared experience, commonalities and connections and enrich the life of the group.